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it's been an age [Nov. 20th, 2009|11:42 pm]
[Current Mood |contemplativecontemplative]

i don't know if anyone reads this still but i suppose that's not always why i write.

Nino and i got back together by the end of september...Ooo...i almost made a decision and stuck to it.

instead i faltered for the comfort and got sucked right back into promises and unfilled wishes.

needless to say we broke up, nearly a year later...today to be exact.

he's pretty much the most negative person i've ever met and i just kept thinking if i could be positive enough for the both of us he'd snap out of it eventually.

But that's not the case.

this time i mean though. this time i'm cutting him off completely. i don't want to see him at all if it's possible.

i just couldn't keep him from letting the little things from getting him down and on top of that responsibility i toppled on a bunch more to try and make things easier for him.

that was my mistake and my fault in all this. I made things too easy for him and in the end he needed more time to realize all my effort wasn't too wait on him hand and foot but instead to recuperate him back into the world after so many bad things had happened to him. it backfired.

so neither of us is blameless, but i do believe i'm better off in the long run.

i can't run myself into the ground to continue building him up.

i'm sorry for that Nino. i'm pretty sure you don't read this but just in case.

[User Picture]From: self_awakening
2009-11-21 05:52 pm (UTC)
I'm still here, reading and waiting for you to return. We managed to drift apart again in recent times but I still love you dearly and I still wish for nothing but the best for you. I want you to be happy and I think that the step you have taken may be the beginning of a road that leads you to happiness. xxx
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